| 10 reasons why I hate Twilight. |
1. Edward's chest is 'incandescent'. Need I say more? His chest is a freaking light source. It glows, as a lightbulb would in a darkened room. How romantic. At least they could sneak around in the dead of night (as vampires are want to do) and not get lost.
2. 'Bella stared at the opaque blackboard'. No shit, Sherlock. I often stare at the transparent one they installed in the Maths block last week.
3. What Bella and Edward have is essentially an abusive relationship. A do-as-I-say-because-if-you-don't-you-get-eaten relationship. A technically illegal relationship which 12 year olds the world over find attractive.
4. Bella's character flaws are that she's clumsy and unattractive. God, I'm practically a bloody villain if those are character flaws. I'd be the troll under the bridge.
5. They get married when Bella's 17/18. That in itself is pathetic. I see a divorce on the horizon.
6. Edward reads the mind of their unborn child. Yes, he reads the mind of a foetus. Now, I don't know about you, but I never expected foetuses to have a huge intellectual capacity. It's been proven (apparently) that they can't feel pain, so can they real feel love? I'm no psychologist, but it doesn't seem likely.
7. The baby will grow super-rapidly-fast until it's a teenager, then stop growing. Now if that isn't a plot of convenience, nothing is. It's like Stephenie Meyer thought, 'screw that, I'm not going to write about 17 years of a kid's life, let's condense it into a few months and make it stop growing then so that 12 year old boys can fantasise over it. Yeah.'
8. Vegetarian vampires.
9. The fanbase are all super-obsessed and illiterate. Tell one of them that Twilight sucks and they're all 'omg no wayzzzz i iz mrs edward culen he iz sxc nd its rlyy wel writn!!!!!!!!!1111one'.
10. True love? At 17/18 years old? Oh come on.Labels: list, rant |
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YES! YES! YES! did i mention yes?
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Whenever someone mentions Twilight, or the word "incandescent", I'll always think of you.
;]
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Name: AnwenKya
Home: Cardiff
About Me: I am a 5ft blonde teenager with an overactive imagination, bad temper and terrifying sense of humour. Hear me roar!
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posted by AnwenKya at 
YES! YES! YES! did i mention yes?